Well, this shouldn't come as a shock to anyone, but I got moved.....again. I believe that it is the Commander's intent to have me experience every sort of living experience that FOB Salerno has to offer. It was pretty rapid notice too. I was informed out of the blue on Monday that I would be packing up once again, but that it wouldn't be for another two weeks. Lo and behold, Tuesday at 0630z rolled around and I was packing my bags and waiting for the go signal to start moving. Now, I can't complain too much because I now live in a tent with wall lockers and .....wait for it...... A BED!!!!! Damn the cots, I have a twin size bed. Oh its nice. The AC is a little suspect, as it went out almost 24 hours after I moved in, but I got it fixed and things could be worse. I'm 10 feet from the shower, so I am pretty sure I can roll out in basketball shorts and not get caught.
To Mary Whisenand, hell yeah share my comments. I am always looking to make people laugh or brighten their day. I can start telling jokes if it helps too. Like, a guy walks into a bar, what does he get? A second degree concussion! Ah, hell. My air force compatriot and I are currently telling bar jokes back and forth to pass the time, hence the hilarity. Not too much else going on since I last wrote. Everybody got all nostalgic about my mom being proud. That threw me for a loop. I imagine she knew I was going to be a soldier, better yet a paratrooper, but she is probably cursing it the same way my Aunts and stepmom are. You all can take solace in the fact that I am completely bored and not doing anything remotely dangerous. Probably the most exciting thing that I do is go to gym. At least I think it is exciting, I am starting to see some significant gains.
One thing that blows my mind right now is the Cubs. C'mon, will somebody light a fire under their ass and telling them that thousands of troops depend on them for a morale boost and they are failing miserably. I have already got my work schedule planned out for the World Series if they make it. The NL Central is not that tough. Draw some walks, play smart baseball. PLEASE!!! Now that I got that off my chest, I am good to go for now. You'd be amazed at how many people have offered to send me alcohol while I am over here. I am flattered, but those requests will have to wait until I get home. I like having Corporal stripes and the sense of responsibility that goes with it. I also liking having the power to threaten privates with a smoke session that will bring them with an inch of their life if they don't get something done :). That tactic is effective.
I really want to jump some time soon. Just once. My morale would be boosted for, like, 15 minutes.
All the Way.
Thursday, May 31, 2007
Monday, May 28, 2007
An insight into Army lingo...
Hooah(who-ah) adj. verb. (Slang term used by U.S. Army soldiers: refers to or means anything and everything except "no". Not to be confused with the Marine "Hoorah".) (Word is said in near grunting/barking manner). 1. What to say when at a loss for words: "Corporal, what do you think of this idea?" "Hooah". 2. Excellent: "We are engaging the enemy with 25 rounds 155mm HE." "(Emphatically) Hooah!" 3. Roger, message received, understood: "Do you #@$^&%* understand me soldier?!" "Hooah." 4. Glad to meet you, hello: "I am Major Payne, nice to meet you." "Hooah, good morning, sir". 5. Digging deep: "I was dog ass tired. I really had to hooah myself through that course." 6. To be very hardcore, i.e. all about the Army; see Bad ass: "That guy made it through Ranger school in one cycle with a broken leg. He is real hooah, hooah." 7. To be about the Army a little bit too much; see certain former AIT classmates of CPL. Kyle Dykstra: "That kid is way too hooah." 8. A verbal sign of acknowledgement: "Airborne, are you ready to jump?" "HOOAH!!". 9. A general sense of relief: "All units are return to base, safe and sound." "Hooah."
So, if you ever hear a soldier say that word, they are probably using it in one of those contexts. There are probably more but everybody has their own interpretation. When I got to Basic Training, my Drill Sergeant forbade my platoon from saying it. I was confused at first as to why we weren't allowed to say a word that showed we were enthusiastic for something. Drill Sergeant Starks, however, explained to us that we hadn't earned the right to say it. To him, it was an offense to all the soldiers past and present for brand new recruits to be using a word that we hadn't worked for, we hadn't sweated for, we hadn't bled for. Only when we graduated Basic were we allowed to say that word. Sure enough, we kept the word from our lips at all times except for when we recited the Soldiers Creed : I am an American Soldier, HOOAH! (When I went to Ft. Sill, they did not say hooah at the end. Perhaps that is why I liked Ft. Benning so much more.)
Seeing as it is Memorial Day, that small lesson (one of many) seems more pertinent. I have earned the right to say that word, as well as wear this uniform and represent this country because of those that came before me. While I haven't had it too hard, I have still had to make sacrifices along with everyone else in my unit. I'm not going to complain though (and even if I did, what good would it do?). I still make pretty good money, I am getting my education paid for, and I am learning some valuable life lessons ( I used to say that I get to blow stuff up, but that has come to a screeeeeeching halt, but my time will come later :) ). Just remember, you don't have to love the war, but try to love the warrior. I don't know how many times people thanked me when I was flying home. I even had a dinner paid for me by an anonymous patron in Dallas, TX. I am sure that the response is going to be even more overwhelming when I come home on leave or back from deployment. Just try to remember that this is not an easy life. I will be the first to admit that I have taken a lot of things for granted and I will have a whole new outlook on life when I get back. That being said though, I wouldn't trade what I have learned for anything and I couldn't see myself doing anything else at this point.
As far as packages go, I've had no problem getting them. Of course, I wouldn't really know if there was a problem en route if I didn't know they were coming. I still appreciate it everytime I come into work and see a letter or box with my name on it. Uncle Bob, someday you and I can sit down and discuss the lethality of and general pain-in-the-ass that 107mm and 122mm rockets are. We are still getting some nasty thunderstorms here. We had a thunder burst that sounded like a bomb exploded right above my tent. I thought it was cool, but my counterpart at night said it jolted him out of bed. Also, a lot of people have commented on my sign off "All the Way". That is the standard phrase of the 82nd Airborne. Everytime we salute an officer, we address them with the greeting "All the Way" and they respond "Airborne". It is pretty self explanatory, but it pretty much means that we will always accomplish our mission, no matter how long it takes or how many times we get extended. We will go to the end, despite what obstacles are thrown at us. Again, thanx for the letters and packages.
All the Way.
So, if you ever hear a soldier say that word, they are probably using it in one of those contexts. There are probably more but everybody has their own interpretation. When I got to Basic Training, my Drill Sergeant forbade my platoon from saying it. I was confused at first as to why we weren't allowed to say a word that showed we were enthusiastic for something. Drill Sergeant Starks, however, explained to us that we hadn't earned the right to say it. To him, it was an offense to all the soldiers past and present for brand new recruits to be using a word that we hadn't worked for, we hadn't sweated for, we hadn't bled for. Only when we graduated Basic were we allowed to say that word. Sure enough, we kept the word from our lips at all times except for when we recited the Soldiers Creed : I am an American Soldier, HOOAH! (When I went to Ft. Sill, they did not say hooah at the end. Perhaps that is why I liked Ft. Benning so much more.)
Seeing as it is Memorial Day, that small lesson (one of many) seems more pertinent. I have earned the right to say that word, as well as wear this uniform and represent this country because of those that came before me. While I haven't had it too hard, I have still had to make sacrifices along with everyone else in my unit. I'm not going to complain though (and even if I did, what good would it do?). I still make pretty good money, I am getting my education paid for, and I am learning some valuable life lessons ( I used to say that I get to blow stuff up, but that has come to a screeeeeeching halt, but my time will come later :) ). Just remember, you don't have to love the war, but try to love the warrior. I don't know how many times people thanked me when I was flying home. I even had a dinner paid for me by an anonymous patron in Dallas, TX. I am sure that the response is going to be even more overwhelming when I come home on leave or back from deployment. Just try to remember that this is not an easy life. I will be the first to admit that I have taken a lot of things for granted and I will have a whole new outlook on life when I get back. That being said though, I wouldn't trade what I have learned for anything and I couldn't see myself doing anything else at this point.
As far as packages go, I've had no problem getting them. Of course, I wouldn't really know if there was a problem en route if I didn't know they were coming. I still appreciate it everytime I come into work and see a letter or box with my name on it. Uncle Bob, someday you and I can sit down and discuss the lethality of and general pain-in-the-ass that 107mm and 122mm rockets are. We are still getting some nasty thunderstorms here. We had a thunder burst that sounded like a bomb exploded right above my tent. I thought it was cool, but my counterpart at night said it jolted him out of bed. Also, a lot of people have commented on my sign off "All the Way". That is the standard phrase of the 82nd Airborne. Everytime we salute an officer, we address them with the greeting "All the Way" and they respond "Airborne". It is pretty self explanatory, but it pretty much means that we will always accomplish our mission, no matter how long it takes or how many times we get extended. We will go to the end, despite what obstacles are thrown at us. Again, thanx for the letters and packages.
All the Way.
Monday, May 21, 2007
Day 127
I'm having one of those "Aww, hell, I'll write something" moments. Actually, I need to clarify something about my last post. I wasn't trying to come off as depressed and melancholy. I was stating that I have realized that I am happier being in the field and sleeping on the ground than I am with doing a desk job. I do realize that what I do is important and will probably serve me well in the future but right now I am just young and dumb and want to experience all the fun (i.e. crazy, stupid, dangerous) stuff. Thats why I am constantly looking for ways to challenge myself. Thats why I tucked away a list of schools and things I want to accomplish. These aren't just the physical Army hooah hooah schools, but other things like learning two languages, completing the list of correspondence courses I have looked into, and getting my Master's when I get back. The way I look at it is the more things I do, the more I will learn and experience and then my dream of being Jack Bauer of 24 will be realized (HA! Caught Y'all! I had you thinking that this was a deep soul-searching and defining moment and I threw the curveball! But seriously, I do have lists and goals like that.
And thats what makes coming into work a little more tolerable. You see, I have a purpose now. Yes, I had things that needed to get done during the night. However, once I got those things accomplished I had all this down time that I didn't know what to do with. You can only watch so many movies before you become guilty that you aren't doing something to better yourself (at least thats how I feel). The same applies to working out. I've gotten into a routine of getting off work and going directly to the gym. I try to follow a strict plan and try to avoid the vice of eating all the nice food that people send us (Chicken and Tuna packets are always welcome). I guess you could say I have become more disciplined in my routine. It took me awhile to snap of that procrastination mode I sunk into in college (Take note, this is someone who wrote a 44-page senior thesis in three days and finished it 12 hours before it was due when they had all semester to write it).
Now, much to everyone's pleasure, that is the most excitement I have going on in my life. I can't really say what is going on over here. Just pay attention to the news. I am still in line to go on leave in December, which means that it should stick because this is the longest I have gone without my leave date changing. I can't gurantee that I will be home by Christmas because it all depends on the weather. I could spend a couple of days where I am going or a week, who knows. I do know that the Cubs took 2 of 3 from the White Sox and I am happy for that. They are starting to get warm.
All the Way.
And thats what makes coming into work a little more tolerable. You see, I have a purpose now. Yes, I had things that needed to get done during the night. However, once I got those things accomplished I had all this down time that I didn't know what to do with. You can only watch so many movies before you become guilty that you aren't doing something to better yourself (at least thats how I feel). The same applies to working out. I've gotten into a routine of getting off work and going directly to the gym. I try to follow a strict plan and try to avoid the vice of eating all the nice food that people send us (Chicken and Tuna packets are always welcome). I guess you could say I have become more disciplined in my routine. It took me awhile to snap of that procrastination mode I sunk into in college (Take note, this is someone who wrote a 44-page senior thesis in three days and finished it 12 hours before it was due when they had all semester to write it).
Now, much to everyone's pleasure, that is the most excitement I have going on in my life. I can't really say what is going on over here. Just pay attention to the news. I am still in line to go on leave in December, which means that it should stick because this is the longest I have gone without my leave date changing. I can't gurantee that I will be home by Christmas because it all depends on the weather. I could spend a couple of days where I am going or a week, who knows. I do know that the Cubs took 2 of 3 from the White Sox and I am happy for that. They are starting to get warm.
All the Way.
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
What have you done with your college education?
So, I graduated from college almost a year ago. As I sit here and ponder (because I really don't have anything better to do....I probably do, I just don't want to do it right now) I think about everything I have done with my college education. To be honest, I really haven't applied my Political Science degree to much in the Army. However, I like to think that I have experienced quite a bit compared to my fellow graduates. How many have had to low crawl 110 meters after a two day FTX in 100 degree Georgia swamps while having to keep their head down because of a M240B firing 10 feet above them? Or what about the over 100 miles marched w/ and w/o a ruck in a 60 day period? Or getting smoked for 2.5 hours in full battle rattle? How about getting to call in Artillery fire for a week straight? Or jump out of a moving aircraft 8 times in two months? Or spending nearly half of your time in the military being deployed to a country that is still trying to work out the kinks?
Now, I am not saying that my fellow graduates have led dull lives. I am sure that they haven't. It will just be an interesting class reunion in a few years when people ask "So, what have you been doing?" Granted, I am not overly estatic to be sitting at a computer for my deployment. I expected something quite different (You see, this is the point where all my relatives shake their heads and think to themselves that they are estatic I am sitting at a computer and doing nothing). I think my restlessness of sitting behind a computer and seeing no end to it comes from my need to be doing something. I see it as kind of ironic that I joined the Army to not sit behind a desk all day and look at where I am at now. Now, I don't have some sort of death wish or this insatiable craving for action but I also want to say that I took on our enemy head on. I don't want to be talking with other members of the 82nd or any unit and hang my head and say that I was simply a FOBbit for my entire deployment. I do not possess the type of personality to be content with just sitting around doing nothing. Ask my dad, he will tell you that better than anyone based on past experiences with sports.
Don't worry, I'm not going to go off the deep end and do something crazy. I will finish my time here without complaint (sometimes it is better just to shut up and take it than it is to rattle the cages), but I know that I am still craving more. I like to be challenged. One thing I have learned in the past year is that I don't like to quit. There were times that things really sucked. Somehow, though, I dug deep and found that extra gear. From what I have heard about some of the things I want to do in the Army, that extra gear is all you need to succeed. Believe me, there were times where I did not want to step out of that airplane. But once I did, it was a rush.
I guess the point that I am trying to make is that I have learned that I cannot be complacent and happy at the same time. I like the training, I like having to push myself, I like being sleeping in the field, I like having the weather suck to an extent. Speaking of the weather, we had another sand storm. It quickly becoming a weekly thing. Again, I thought the tent was going down. Nothing too exciting to report. I apologize if I do send thank yous for all the packages and mail I receive. I am stuck in such a routine over here that I just forget. I do appreciate everything that I get. Only 7 months till I come home.
All the Way.
Now, I am not saying that my fellow graduates have led dull lives. I am sure that they haven't. It will just be an interesting class reunion in a few years when people ask "So, what have you been doing?" Granted, I am not overly estatic to be sitting at a computer for my deployment. I expected something quite different (You see, this is the point where all my relatives shake their heads and think to themselves that they are estatic I am sitting at a computer and doing nothing). I think my restlessness of sitting behind a computer and seeing no end to it comes from my need to be doing something. I see it as kind of ironic that I joined the Army to not sit behind a desk all day and look at where I am at now. Now, I don't have some sort of death wish or this insatiable craving for action but I also want to say that I took on our enemy head on. I don't want to be talking with other members of the 82nd or any unit and hang my head and say that I was simply a FOBbit for my entire deployment. I do not possess the type of personality to be content with just sitting around doing nothing. Ask my dad, he will tell you that better than anyone based on past experiences with sports.
Don't worry, I'm not going to go off the deep end and do something crazy. I will finish my time here without complaint (sometimes it is better just to shut up and take it than it is to rattle the cages), but I know that I am still craving more. I like to be challenged. One thing I have learned in the past year is that I don't like to quit. There were times that things really sucked. Somehow, though, I dug deep and found that extra gear. From what I have heard about some of the things I want to do in the Army, that extra gear is all you need to succeed. Believe me, there were times where I did not want to step out of that airplane. But once I did, it was a rush.
I guess the point that I am trying to make is that I have learned that I cannot be complacent and happy at the same time. I like the training, I like having to push myself, I like being sleeping in the field, I like having the weather suck to an extent. Speaking of the weather, we had another sand storm. It quickly becoming a weekly thing. Again, I thought the tent was going down. Nothing too exciting to report. I apologize if I do send thank yous for all the packages and mail I receive. I am stuck in such a routine over here that I just forget. I do appreciate everything that I get. Only 7 months till I come home.
All the Way.
Monday, May 7, 2007
The finance system strikes again....
As if not receiving jump pay for the past 7 months wasn’t enough, the finance section decided to screw me out of some more money. Originally, I was told that I would be receiving my yearly bonus on the anniversary of my Basic Active Service Date, which happens to be in week. This occurrence has somewhat crept up and I didn’t think much of it until some of my soldiers, who actually have about two weeks on me as far time in the Army, began to put the paperwork together to secure this nice little chunk of tax-free cash. As this process began to unravel, a disturbing rumor came to light. Not only would we not be receiving our tax-free bonus on our anniversary date, we would not get it for another 6 months. We would be receiving on the anniversary of when we got to our unit. This is not the first time I have had to haggle with this. I was told that my originally bonus would hit my bank account when I completed basic training. Enh, wrong. Received at the end of AIT, wrong again. Jump pay taking effect as soon as finish Airborne school, nope. Now, I can understand the Army not wanting to pay me my initial bonus until I get to my first unit. They want to guarantee payment to a soldier who has completed his initial entry training and therefore deserves the money. No bones with that at all. But when I have our personnel department telling us that we should get the money on our BASD anniversary and then finance telling us to go away and come back in six months, its slightly irritating. Coupled with that finding out that our “no-charged” Christmas leave was actually charged to our built-up leave days, you start to wonder what is going on.
I realize that I signed my life away for 4 years and 17 weeks. I knew what I was getting myself into. So, therefore, I am not surprised. Getting extended is not a problem with me, but when your financial support system begins to fail you, it becomes more than a minor inconvenience. My gripe about my jump pay could be a moot point pending my next Leave and Earnings Statement. And the nice backpay check that I will be getting for 7 months of non-paid jump status will somewhat ease the frustration of not collecting on my bonus, but I am not holding my breath at this point. The irony is that we are constantly encouraged to re-enlist, with the promise of a nice-sized bonus if we take a certain offer. In reality, how much of that will I really see? With our current military situation, soldiers are beginning to take a look at options elsewhere. I can’t blame them. While the proposed situation of being deployed 15 months out of 27 months, but a guaranteed 12 at home seems enticing, lets break it down. More than likely, those 12 months include several weeks of 16-18 hour days of refitting, cleaning, and inventorying equipment. There will also probably be numerous FTX’s to deal with lessons learned from previous deployments. Don’t forget to include a month long stay at Ft. Polk or the National Training Center to prepare for an upcoming deployment. In reality, the new deployment system doesn’t really change anything. It just guarantees us more time overseas.
Enough of my rants for the time being. Without giving away any secrets, I am going to attempt to break down to y’all how things work where I am at. Lets say that I work for a large and well respected pork producing company, which just happens to be stationed in Afghanistan (anyone else see the irony and lack of cultural respect in this?). There are the local plants (the battalions), the regional headquarters (that’s me), and the corporate headquarters(division). I have to monitor everything that goes on with the local plants and make sure that any needs they have are met and passed along to the corporate HQ. Every night I need to check with my local plants and make sure that everything is going smoothly. Usually it is, but if something is not right, if a piece of equipment is broken or has moved to another plant, I need to include it in my nightly report.
Well, corporate HQ is in infinite wisdom and glory has deemed it necessary to know every little detail about what goes on at the local plant level:
Local Plant (LP): “Hey, we have a broken handle on a pump for this pork grinding machine thingy.”
Me: “Okay, can it still do the job?”
LP: “I think so, but I’m not exactly sure what it exactly does or is. Its not really my job area.”
Me: “I’ll pass the word along.”
Time elapses…report sent up…30 minutes later:
Corporate HQ (CH): “Hey, whats the deal with the pork grinding machine thingy at that one place?”
Me: “The handle is broken.”
CH: “What handle?”
Me: “The handle. I have no idea what it is, they just told me the handle was broken.”
CH: “My supervisor wants to talk to you.”
Me: (Groaning) “Okay”.
CH: “Hey, I have worked on the pork machine grinding thingy before. Its still able to get the job done. I don’t know what they are talking about down there, but it should be alright.”
Me: “So, do you want me to tell the local plant that they need to change its status or what?”.
CH: “Find out what exactly is wrong with the handle and how it relates to the overall pork grinding machine thingy and get back to us”.
Me: “Roger.”
Time elapses…I call the local plant, the local plant still doesn’t know what is going. Call another local plant and ask an expert in the pork machine grinding thingy about the pump handle and he tells me that since the handle is broken for the pump that it cannot do its job. Ask my supervisor about the pump handle on the thingy and he tells me it can’t do the job. Report that back to CH and all is well with the world.
Another aspect involves when the local plants want to increase operations or undertake a project to eliminate competition in their area. Well, in order to do that, they need to get clearance from the CH. Sometimes the CH is very picky about where they want to allocate their assets and efforts. So, if the local plants would like to use a Corporate asset, they need to submit a request. Now sometimes the request is good, sometimes its not. Most of the time, however, the point is made, but not in the proper format. Anyone who has seen “Office Space” can relate to the issue of the TPS reports not being filled out properly. If one tiny little thing is wrong, it gets kicked back down to the regional headquarters (Me). Then I have to go through the painstaking process of getting ahold of the local plant to tell them what was wrong and how to fix. Sometimes the local plants don’t like to be bothered with such mundane tasks and question whether we know what is going on or what type of competition they are going up against. Behold the joys of middle management.
Carrie Jo, just so you know, I say my first camel spider this week. It wasn’t very big, about the size of my palm, but one ugly SOB to say the least. If you really want one, I’ll try and get one for you, but that’s on you. It has been pretty quiet lately. Only 7 months till leave. Thank God I am coming home when I am because there is a 26.2 mile marathon being run around the FOB somewhere IVO Christmas. It is highly encouraged in my section to do it. Listen, no offense to marathon runners, I have all the respect in the world for you, I do. That is an achievement you should be proud of. However, my max is like 8 miles. My idea of a 26 mile marathon is going to a bar, saying “Hey, there’s another bar about a mile down the road! Lets run there!” and repeating that about 26 times or until I fall down in the street. I’ll do PT and everything and do the cadence runs, I enjoy those, but running, for like three hours straight, I’ll pass thank you.
All The Way.
I realize that I signed my life away for 4 years and 17 weeks. I knew what I was getting myself into. So, therefore, I am not surprised. Getting extended is not a problem with me, but when your financial support system begins to fail you, it becomes more than a minor inconvenience. My gripe about my jump pay could be a moot point pending my next Leave and Earnings Statement. And the nice backpay check that I will be getting for 7 months of non-paid jump status will somewhat ease the frustration of not collecting on my bonus, but I am not holding my breath at this point. The irony is that we are constantly encouraged to re-enlist, with the promise of a nice-sized bonus if we take a certain offer. In reality, how much of that will I really see? With our current military situation, soldiers are beginning to take a look at options elsewhere. I can’t blame them. While the proposed situation of being deployed 15 months out of 27 months, but a guaranteed 12 at home seems enticing, lets break it down. More than likely, those 12 months include several weeks of 16-18 hour days of refitting, cleaning, and inventorying equipment. There will also probably be numerous FTX’s to deal with lessons learned from previous deployments. Don’t forget to include a month long stay at Ft. Polk or the National Training Center to prepare for an upcoming deployment. In reality, the new deployment system doesn’t really change anything. It just guarantees us more time overseas.
Enough of my rants for the time being. Without giving away any secrets, I am going to attempt to break down to y’all how things work where I am at. Lets say that I work for a large and well respected pork producing company, which just happens to be stationed in Afghanistan (anyone else see the irony and lack of cultural respect in this?). There are the local plants (the battalions), the regional headquarters (that’s me), and the corporate headquarters(division). I have to monitor everything that goes on with the local plants and make sure that any needs they have are met and passed along to the corporate HQ. Every night I need to check with my local plants and make sure that everything is going smoothly. Usually it is, but if something is not right, if a piece of equipment is broken or has moved to another plant, I need to include it in my nightly report.
Well, corporate HQ is in infinite wisdom and glory has deemed it necessary to know every little detail about what goes on at the local plant level:
Local Plant (LP): “Hey, we have a broken handle on a pump for this pork grinding machine thingy.”
Me: “Okay, can it still do the job?”
LP: “I think so, but I’m not exactly sure what it exactly does or is. Its not really my job area.”
Me: “I’ll pass the word along.”
Time elapses…report sent up…30 minutes later:
Corporate HQ (CH): “Hey, whats the deal with the pork grinding machine thingy at that one place?”
Me: “The handle is broken.”
CH: “What handle?”
Me: “The handle. I have no idea what it is, they just told me the handle was broken.”
CH: “My supervisor wants to talk to you.”
Me: (Groaning) “Okay”.
CH: “Hey, I have worked on the pork machine grinding thingy before. Its still able to get the job done. I don’t know what they are talking about down there, but it should be alright.”
Me: “So, do you want me to tell the local plant that they need to change its status or what?”.
CH: “Find out what exactly is wrong with the handle and how it relates to the overall pork grinding machine thingy and get back to us”.
Me: “Roger.”
Time elapses…I call the local plant, the local plant still doesn’t know what is going. Call another local plant and ask an expert in the pork machine grinding thingy about the pump handle and he tells me that since the handle is broken for the pump that it cannot do its job. Ask my supervisor about the pump handle on the thingy and he tells me it can’t do the job. Report that back to CH and all is well with the world.
Another aspect involves when the local plants want to increase operations or undertake a project to eliminate competition in their area. Well, in order to do that, they need to get clearance from the CH. Sometimes the CH is very picky about where they want to allocate their assets and efforts. So, if the local plants would like to use a Corporate asset, they need to submit a request. Now sometimes the request is good, sometimes its not. Most of the time, however, the point is made, but not in the proper format. Anyone who has seen “Office Space” can relate to the issue of the TPS reports not being filled out properly. If one tiny little thing is wrong, it gets kicked back down to the regional headquarters (Me). Then I have to go through the painstaking process of getting ahold of the local plant to tell them what was wrong and how to fix. Sometimes the local plants don’t like to be bothered with such mundane tasks and question whether we know what is going on or what type of competition they are going up against. Behold the joys of middle management.
Carrie Jo, just so you know, I say my first camel spider this week. It wasn’t very big, about the size of my palm, but one ugly SOB to say the least. If you really want one, I’ll try and get one for you, but that’s on you. It has been pretty quiet lately. Only 7 months till leave. Thank God I am coming home when I am because there is a 26.2 mile marathon being run around the FOB somewhere IVO Christmas. It is highly encouraged in my section to do it. Listen, no offense to marathon runners, I have all the respect in the world for you, I do. That is an achievement you should be proud of. However, my max is like 8 miles. My idea of a 26 mile marathon is going to a bar, saying “Hey, there’s another bar about a mile down the road! Lets run there!” and repeating that about 26 times or until I fall down in the street. I’ll do PT and everything and do the cadence runs, I enjoy those, but running, for like three hours straight, I’ll pass thank you.
All The Way.
Friday, May 4, 2007
If you can understand this....
FYSA. I’m GTG ATT. Currently, I’m IVO the TOC on the FOB. I went W/U on 15012007 and was W/D NLT 1000z 20012007. WILCO w/ GO#1 and its NP with that. THX for the mail. Luckily on the FOB, we receive no SAF, just RKTs. Well, TAFN. Try not to LOL too hard.
Yes, this message does not follow a proper sentence structure, but I just thought I would give you an insight into how some conversations can go. And you sometimes wonder why people look at the things the military does and go “Huh?”. We can’t even understand each other. I could throw more acronyms in there, but enough for one post.
ATW.
Yes, this message does not follow a proper sentence structure, but I just thought I would give you an insight into how some conversations can go. And you sometimes wonder why people look at the things the military does and go “Huh?”. We can’t even understand each other. I could throw more acronyms in there, but enough for one post.
ATW.
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